My wish

This past week, my husband and I celebrated our 30th wedding anniversary. At some times it seems like yesterday , and other times it seems like forever ago.
Nevertheless,  it is a milestone for us. WE had the opportunity to go to Hawaii ( grandma stayed with the two younger girls and the dogs.) IT was a much needed break for us.

After a few days, I was overcome with a profound sense of sadness for my son Tyler and all the other LGBTQ+ individuals who are taught that in order to remain part of Gods kingdom, they must forego any type of personal relationship . Oh they can have "friends" but they can't date or have a committed relationship or marry even though it is legal in many places.

This is "acting on their feelings"
What happened to " Adam fell that men may be . Men are that they might have JOY!!""

Heavenly Father wants us to be happy
 In several articles published Here   and Here,

They discuss the issue of lack of connection and lack of human contact and its detrimental effects. If children die in orphanges because of the lack of human contact and interraction, don't you tihnk that could have negative effects on an adult as well?

As human beings we long to be loved, accepted, touched,and included.
Yes, some of this can come from our parents and other family members, but at some point as those family members move on to their own fulfilled relationships, our LGBTQ+ memebers are left alone and isolated.

Sitting on a beach likes this, watching the sun rise on a new day  and being able to just relax and hold hands with the person who means the most to you in this life. 

That is connection 

Being able to share your hopes and dreams, and even your fears. 

So many jump to the issue of that  three letter word... SEX

It really has very little to do with that. 

Brene' Brown states..

“Connection is why we're here; it is what gives purpose and meaning to our lives. The power that connection holds in our lives was confirmed when the main concern about connection emerged as the fear of disconnection; the fear that something we have done or failed to do, something about who we are or where we come from, has made us unlovable and unworthy of connection.”

Human beings thrive on connection

It breaks my heart to think that Tyler and so many others like him have grown up being taught the gospel and have tried to live within those perameters and now find themselves facing a life of disconnection. 

Not from us as his parents , or even his siblings, 

but from a life of sharing those moments of joy when you buy your first house , 

or bring home your first little boy. 

The frustration when your husband doesn't do things exactly like you thougth he should and you argue and work through it.

Calling to tell them you got that new job!

Trying that new meal your spouse made and pretending it was great.

The joy of watching your children excell in their talents. 

Enjoying a quiet night snuggled on the couch watching your favorite tv show.

Sharing a favorite treat together .

Deciding together whether or not to buy a new car or just keep fixing the old one.

Attending church together and finding peace in your Faith and worship. 

Taking family vacations, 

Late nights talking about life, and children ,

and just having a best friend by your side. 

WHY??? 

Why are our children told they are exempt from this in their life? 

I just don't understand this. 

My wish is for Tyler ( and all others)  to find someone to love and who will love him in return. To have all those things that I have experienced, both good and bad in the last 30 years,

 and those things in the years to come.

To be able to go to Hawaii, or wherever he chooses and celebrate his anniversary , enjoying the sights and sounds that this beautiful world has to offer, ... with his best friend and companion. 

On one of our last days in Hawaii we saw this rainbow.Its a bit hard to see in the picture. 

I felt this was a sign for me that Heavenly Father knew my heart was heavy about this.

That he was aware of me,   and TYLER! 

 I loved being in that beautiful place with my sweetheart,

 and enjoying the sights and sounds of Hawaii, 

but I could not help but wish that things were different for Tyler. 

I couldn't help but wish that he did not have to be burdened with this dilemma of feeling torn between two worlds. 

I imagine that it is much like this view

Seeing all that the gospel had to offer , and recognizing that for his health and sanity he has to view it from a distance. To find out how to reinvent what life looks like for him. 

Trying to find the beauty and the joy that is right there around him even though he sees the beauty that is now far off in the distance. 

Trying to hold onto his faith and testimony and relationship that he has with his Savior. 

Im sure many times feeling as if he is totally all alone out there on that vista in the distance. 

Hoping that one day he will understand this plan that God had for him. 

For me, I cherish the blessings I have and try my best to understand and walk with faith. I cherish the tender mercies I have experienced in my quest for answers. I remember the pains and frustrations of not getting the answers I seek.  

Some days are ok, and some days or weeks are really hard. 

 I want my children to all be happy and fulfilled in this life.

Isn't that what every parent wants? 

As parents of LGBTQ+ individuals, ,it is a whole different set of worries. So many lose hope and feel the burden is too great to bear. We must rally around them with love and acceptance for whatever path they choose here. 

God will be their judge, and I beleive he is way more merciful and understanding than 

we could ever imagine.  

I believe he will hold them in his arms and let them cry and explain it all to them.

 I beleive he will understand their hurt and anger . 

Until then,.... This mother has a wish for all of these individuals to be able to find the joy and happiness that they deserve. That they can be a part of their work , or school or church community , without hiding who they are. That they can love and be loved. That they can share their god given gifts with all of us around them. 

That if they choose they can find a mate and help bring up some of the most vulnerable children out there in the foster care system. 

That others will be able to see them as God's beautiful children, and look for ways to help them on their journey , than be judge and jury of  what they feel should be pointed out.